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Questions Questions Questions, Always The Same Questions....

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St Petersburg 18th September 2011
Travellers piss me off. Not because I dislike them, and not because there is anything offensive about them at all, the smells, the snoring, the communal living, the passing of people, staying in the same places, visiting the same sights, following the same route, but most of all it is the questions, oh my god those questions, I think I will write a postcard and stick it on my left breasticle:
• Where are you going?
• Where have you been?
• How long you here for?
• Where you from?
• How long you travelling for?

Relentless questions, introductions and departures. I tend now to answer these with a dismissive waft of the arm with a well-rehearsed 30 second waffle. Unfortunately of course when you are asked these questions, it is obligatory to ask in return, and so I hear but don’t necessarily listen. Having to ask them their name again numerous times I guess is just a trait of travelling rather than my idle inability to absorb trivial information. Of course travelling is great and getting to Russia has managed to filter all the opportune travellers rather than the occupational travellers I have recently come across. Thankfully I am not expecting to see Mr Skull Fuck and Mr Lederhosen again, and I wouldn’t expect to see any more humiliating performances until I hit the areas more accessible to the party traveller, which at this point may be Australia.
Not all travellers piss me off of course.

JB, the French seaman who I met in Riga who got so drunk and angry about spending 8 months on a cargo ship “with theese fookin crude oil, those sons of bitches, they stole my time, those lousy mother fuckers!!” The Caipirinha was too much for him, last I saw of him he was trying to pinch a soviet soldier’s hat from a soviet bar, he failed, it fell and he was asked to leave. Brave man, but unbelievably French!!!

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Marco, the passionate Italian in love with ‘Liza’, “she-break-a-ma-heart, she a-shatter-it-into-a-thousand-pieces, belisssimo!!!” A researcher on sustainable energy at Cambridge University who sleeps 23 hours a day, my favourite quote from him “My Professor broke a little bit my balls today”.

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A German guy from Munich who had been travelling for 20 months after his company went bust, he was an accountant, “I enjoyed earning the money, but I have enjoyed spending the money even more.”

Chris, the very straight talking and incredibly German business man who works in investments, who got incredibly drunk, dropped his wooden glasses and danced techno style with his top off, naturally.

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Chris, aka Jack Duckworth

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Those stereotypes are there for a reason, I wonder how they interpret their new English Marra?!

3 weeks down, 49 to go……

Article By David Beattie of Rounton Coffee

Posted by beatski 09:47 Archived in Russia

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